Thursday, February 24, 2011

Don't Cry For Me...

Well, it has finally come... my last day of work. I am going to go home and do a different kind of work that (hopefully) involves my pajamas and endless bowls of soups on stormy days. For those of you keeping score at home, I have worked for money since I was a tender twelve year old. Yeah for living in an extremely rural area that did not legally have to observe minimum wage laws, or minimum age work requirements. I find the idea of being at home a bit daunting, in all honesty because a majority (okay, all) of my blog writing takes place at my current job. That means I will post even LESS than usual and what will my two regular readers do to find out what I think about life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness? Tragedy, I know. For your enjoyment here is a little trip down the memory lane of my jobs.

Job 1- Dishwasher at the Current Creek Lodge and Cafe (there was a classy sign spelling this Kern Krik... ugh, but no matter as I called the place The Greasy Spoon, anyway). I had this job throughout my high school career, except that I managed to claw my way up to cashier in the store/gift shop. Many, MANY, good memories are associated with this job. Suffice to say, getting paid under the table was a delight. Sadly, the place no longer exists.

Job 2- Worker at Day's Market Deli. I did this job from the summer I graduated high school and kept coming back for Thanksgiving and Christmas breaks my Freshman year, not to mention the following summer, and before I prepared to leave for the sandy beaches of Brazil where for 1.5 years I was not allowed NEAR a sandy beach. I returned to this job for a month before I returned to university... so lets just say I worked here for quite a while. I managed to become the evening supervisor, a position that I despised, but I was the only one who could count high enough to cash out the till so I was a shoe in. Good memories here as well.

Job 3- Substitute Teacher for Duchesne School District. Yep, I went down that road. This was only while I was preparing NOT to see those sandy beaches so about five months. It was interesting to be in classes with kids who were siblings of my friends. Yep, I WAS a glorified baby sitter. I did not magnify my substitute teaching calling.

Job 4- Custodian in the Brewster Building at good ole BYU. Many of you are unfamiliar with the Brewster Building, that is because it is the planning building and never housed any students for any reason. Basically I dusted for four hours. Oh, I also swept the auto body shop... but when the guys working there found out that I (a mere girl) was sweeping up their auto body messes, they were QUITE tidy. You can find old posts about how I felt about that job here and here and here, for good measure.

Job 5- I am not sure if this technically counts as a job since it was an Internship, but I did receive money for it (illegally I might add! Go Scottish Parliament!). For a brief stint I worked in the PRU--Press and Research Unit for the Scottish National Party. Yes, it was idyllic, and yes, I did love it so. Who doesn't love to get paid to travel to Brussels as part of work?

Job 6- Heritage Schools Night Watch and Team Lead. Oh, the tales I could tell... but I won't because wouldn't that be a violation of HIPPA? I posted about this job as well... I suppose the highlights of this job were that it paid just enough to support my rock star life style, I led a petition about changing work hours, and I got free lunch once a month as part of the Employee Council.

Job 7- This soon to be last job has served me well. A lot of things happened to me while I have been at this job. I got married. I had a kid. I learned all I will ever need to know about retirement planning, nursing homes, medicaid/medicare, Special Needs Trusts, and funeral plans. I had a talk with the Latin Fury recently and discovered that even my own mother has very little idea what I do for work on a daily basis (Why, I write blog posts, Mother). You can find some highlights of my time here, here, here, here...

Honestly, I will miss it. I've liked my co-workers a lot... in all my jobs. I've been fortunate to have really good bosses my entire career, even at The Greasy Spoon. Alas, we'll see what the future holds.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Ruminations the Day After Valentine's Day

As I sit at my work desk (yes, I am at work, right now) munching on Valentine's Day candy, I wonder who decided to call the small packages of candy "Fun Size". There is nothing fun about them. I spend more time then I should opening tiny packages. Is it really worth it? Now a 44 oz bag of candy THAT is fun sized.
*post publishing edit... after posting this my friend (the Beardocrat) informed me that Brian Regan feels the same way and has said so. Now I know my Mormon friends will have a literal fit when I say I do not find Brian Regan funny... But I do not find him funny. I am more of a Dimitri Martin, Jim Gaffigan kind of girl. Despite Mr. Regan's position on this issue, I am not changing my mind.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Tales From The Supermarket: Costco Edition

I love Costco... but I hate Costco as well, and the more I go, the more I hate it. Here is a quick list of the things I love:
Cakes! Could I go into more of a sugar coma because of their frosting... I think not. I like to celebrate every event in my life with a cake from Costco.
Ginormous (yes, I used the word ginormous) boxes of cereal.
Bread..mmm, they have yummy bread from places in Italy that make wonderful French dips.
Chicken Nuggets shaped like dinosaurs.
Excellent frozen vegetables, seriously, the highest quality you are going to get.
Mattresses. We bought our queen sized mattress here after shopping around and it was inexpensive in comparison.
Variety of goods. Where else can you get a mattress, frozen vegetables, power tools, a lap top, and a hot dog for your troubles?
Chicken Bakes. These are great and I don't mind going on a date to Costco if a Chicken Bake is on the menu.

Now, let us get to the most unpleasant list, with emphasis on the last item.
Lines. The checkout always has ridiculously long lines.
Largest carts in the world. I get it that they want me to stock up on 56 rolls of toilet paper and still have room for that pork shoulder, but I just don't need THAT large a cart. You get three of those in an aisle and you have a traffic jam.
Parking lot. It seems like Costco is the worst parking lot for bad driving in a state known for its bad drivers. I nearly get run into every time I go to Costco, and it is a lot, because a girl needs cake.
SAMPLES. I HATE the samples. I really do. First of all, a store is for shopping, not for hanging around trying to get a meal. In addition, the samples turn regular people into a pack of piranhas who have no respect for those that are actually trying to get in and get out of Costco in a reasonable amount of time. I have been jostled, run into, nearly run over, all by people wanting to get a bite sized portion of ravioli or some other nonsense. My estimation of humanity plummets when I watch people going after the samples.