So recently this Drops of Awesome thing has been floating around the internet. Yeah, I deliberately didn't link to it because I hate it. Is hate a strong word? Okay, I strongly dislike it? For those of you who aren't raising young kids and whose friends might not link to stuff like this, let me set the scene. There are mommybloggers who write about the joys/sorrows of raising kids. This is the main purpose of their writings. Every so often one of these ladies will write something uber inspirational and the internet will be up in arms, and everyone will post it on their facebook and I will scoot on over, read it, get my warm fuzzies and move on. Lots of my buddies were posting about Drops of Awesome, so I did my scoot and was slightly horrified at what I found.
Sure, the larger moral is: Don't beat yourself up, you are doing awesome things blah blah blah talk about the Atonement blah blah. The end. I agree to a certain extent. The thing that horrified me was that people actually THINK like the author of the blog (and this isn't a criticism, props to her for finding a way to get over it). People actually second guess every choice they make and every thing they do as a parent or in life. People actually worry so much what everyone else is doing and thinking and saying, that they believe everything they are doing is wrong. PEOPLE THINK LIKE THAT!!! Head scratch. Then I saw sheer number of my friends who posted on facebook about the Drops of Awesome and I thought. What the??? I have amazing friends. Seriously. They are talented, smart, witty, good-natured, kind, good looking. They can do and have done great and important things academically, within their communities, within their families, and at church. They are like McGyver, they can make a lot out of practically nothing. I sincerely hope none of them really feel like the author of Drops of Awesome used to feel.
And yes, before you get up in arms and try to tell me I misunderstood what the author was saying. I didn't. I got it. It just made me sad.
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
This is a picture of the Beardocrat and I on our wedding day
So, to understand the gist of this confession, we need to rewind and I need to tell you a little about myself. I know, more about little ole me, but you are here reading this, so I assume you are interested. I am not a girly-girl. I do like a good cocktail dress and a nice pair of heals, but for the most part I am a t-shirt and jeans type gal. Okay, that isn't strictly true. Currently, I am a wear-my-pjs-all-day sort of gal, but I digress...When the Beardocrat and I began marriage negotiations--kidding, kind of, it was a bit more romantic than that--I began to think of the wedding. Now, I had never thought of a wedding before. I had no idea what I wanted, and to be honest, didn't really care all that much. I think marriage's are important, but weddings... no not really into them. So when we got engaged, or actually the day we got officially engaged (because apparently those two things are different) I went to the bridal shop and picked out a dress. I went alone. I tried on one dress (actually, I did try one the same dress in Ivory and Navy to make sure I liked the red train) and I was done. I didn't bring my gal pals. I didn't bring my mom. I'd looked online the week before, found the dress I liked, went to a bridal store that had it, tried it on to make sure it looked good on me (of course it did!), and bought it. End of story... well, kind of. My parents wanted to see it so I took them the next week and tried it on for them while they took pictures and gushed. The Beardocrat and I had the type of simple wedding that fit our style. We had a BBQ and invited all of our friends complete with Costco Cake (YUM!) and pulled pork sandwiches at the park next to where we lived and wore just whatever. My family had a reception, and Alan's family had an open house. Both our families' did all the work for their respective events and they turned out nice.
Now, fast forward to confession time. I LOVE BRIDAL SHOWS. Seriously, I can't get enough of them. I especially like those where the brides try on dresses. I honestly don't know why I like them. I feel like my wedding and dress and all the events associated with them were perfect for me and don't have any secret desire to go dress shopping or anything, but I can not get enough of watching people try on wedding dresses... psychoanalyze me if you will, I can't explain it.