Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Bad Borrower

The Beardocrat recently let me know that I am a 'bad borrower'... this came right on the heals of our annual frenzied clean (and yes, the Beardocrat and I disagree about clean... but that is another story for another time). I don't know that we have an annual clean, but let us just say, that our living quarters have not been up to my standards for quite some time. Hence the clean, where Alan added to my pile of "Things To Return".
These soft rumblings about my borrowings began at roughly the time we went on a little camping adventure with Big Steve and the Latin Fury et al. I took a book that Big Steve wanted to borrow from me, and a book that I'd borrowed from him and had finished, only to arrive home with the borrowed book still in our possession. This mystified the Beardocrat as both the books were in my suitcase together and in his reasoning it would have been just as easy to hand him two books instead of one... ah, silly boy. He has much to learn. Also on the Beardocrats lists of offenses is a hammer I have had for about seven years. In a major concession (because I, like Henry Clay, am quite the compromiser) I said I would talk to my friend, and find out if he has any ill feelings about the hammer. The following is an excerpt from that IM conversation.

MW: Also, that out of the way, Alan insists I return your hammer.
Yes, I have a hammer that I borrowed from you a million years ago.
Alan says I am a 'bad borrower' and I said that you probably don't even USE hammers that often in your private life, but he asserts it doesn't matter.
CL: I think about that hammer occasionally not that I care at all mind you. But sometimes when I am looking for a hammer I think about it and wonder if I got it back and just lost it or what.
I use them more than you would think, and it is always lost. But I have honestly moved on. Like my blue coat that was in fruitland for five years.
MW: Ha! But to be fair, no one knew the coat was yours. we kept wondering whose it was. Well, when you come back to the office, I will bring you the hammer, and two of your books that I have, and your Into the Woods, since it really is your year or two of custody.
CL: I think alan probably doesn't realize that I am an equally bad borrower, and that I am forgetful enough that I don't even remember having lent things out I had no idea you had books of mine. I think I may have one of yours
MW: You do, a William Thackary book, but that is neither here nor there.

Below you will find a list of all those borrowed items I have, and my theory about borrowing in general.

Hammer-belonging to Casey
The Thought Police (book)-belonging to Casey
Can't remember which Number One Ladies Detective Agency (book)- belonging to Casey
Into The Woods (dvd)-belonging to Casey, although we actually decided that we have joint ownership of this as Casey had my VHS Into the Woods for several years as well.
Jesus the Christ (book)- belonging to Dr. Merrell
The Blue Castle (book)- belonging to Dr. Merrell
Band of Brothers (dvd)- belonging to Marion (actually returned today, so I am not sure if I should even add it to this list, since it is out of my life)
Culture of Corruption (book)- belonging to Big Steve
Daria the complete series (dvd)- belonging to Jen and Mark although the Beardocrat technically borrowed this one. I was just with him at the time.
Guys and Dolls (dvd)- belonging to Abby
(note, I do not add Bride and Prejudice to this list because The Rage just dropped it off at our house one day without having been asked for it)

So there are a few items on that list, but to be fair, most of the people on that list currently have things they have borrowed from me. My philosophy on lending/borrowing is this. I would never lend you things if I felt that you were not going to permanently be part of my life, nor would I borrow things from you. I like to keep my lending and borrowing to that group of people who I feel that I will always see and know. Therefore, allowing me to return items at my leisure, because I don't intend to keep the aforementioned items forever... just for periods that stretch into years.


Casey said...

I find that seeing my IMs quoted in your blog is like hearing a recording of my voice. . . Awkward. I really do know how to write in sentences that don't run on, despite how my IMs may appear.

Oh well.

And it will be nice to have another hammer around the house for me to lose. My real question is, why did you borrow the hammer in the first place?

Wendy said...

I agree about borrowing from and lending to only those who you are going to see regularly. Or just assume that once you lend something out it is gone for good. A good philosophy. :)

Karen said...

At least you keep the things you borrow. You left your Twilight books at the apartment when you moved out. You know, over a year ago when you got married... anyways, I turned one into a book safe (figuring no self-respecting thief would even think to pick up Twilight) and sold it at the ward service auction. For sub-for-santa. You know, for kids (Hudsucker Proxy reference)

The other two got sold at my garage sale a few weeks ago. I hope you're not heartbroken by my betrayal.

The Rage said...

You love Bride and Prejudice... there is no finer Bollywood movie out there. I was wondering where that was just a couple of days ago. How could I forget such a gem?

Anne B. said...

I find it amazing that given the fact it has been 10 years (excepting LVDW's wedding) that I last saw Casey, I KNEW who the CL was just by the "tone" of the message. I love that. :)

Also, even though you and I don't see each other a whole lot, I hope you know that you can borrow something from me anytime. And if I do happen to need it back--AND I remember who I leant it to--I'd just ask politely to borrow it from you. Then return it just as promptly.

smithfieldman said...

Speaking of things you might not know where they are, if you haven't found your CTR ring, they are probably with my spare set of keys in the netherworld.

The Rage said...

Ah... the netherworld or what I like to call it - Michele's house :)